Hesh and Sofia

Sofia: "You call that a whipping?! I've had worse at the hands of my arthritic 84-year-old Mother Superior!"

Hesh: "Me am just startin'. Boss say, work yoo over good."

Sofia: "Dearie, it's your technique that needs work; you're depending too much on your (admittedly excellent) arm strength and not getting enough snap in the wrist. I can tell how much you enjoy this...mmmm, I didn't think your hands would be so soft..."

Hesh: "T'anks. Me moisturize every day wit' blood o' fresh-slaughtered pixies."

Sofia: "Eeeuuwww. Look, if you really want to learn how to handle whips, leave your fool of a Boss and enter service in The Church(tm). Help me escape, and even I'll write a letter of recommendation to get you into the convent where I trained..."

Hesh: "Me no like Boss, he don' pay so good. I t'ink aboot it, hokay? But first I try it hagain, like yoo say, wit' wrist snap."

Sofia: (sighs)"...since I've been so helpful to you and all, would you please activate the Rod of Vibration that your Boss left stuffed up my ass first?"

(written by Rimble)